Gaslighting – In Narcissism

Gaslighting or gas-lighting is a form of psychological abuse and is a central component of Stockholm syndrome, in which a victim is manipulated into doubting his or her own memory, perception, and sanity. Instances may range from the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred, up to staging or manufacturing bizarre events by the abuser, with the intention of disorienting the victim into believing they are the one with the memory or false memory problem!

Many forms of psychological torture methods can be employed in an attempt to destroy the subject’s normal self-image by removing their capacity, or their human rights from having any kind of control over their environment, creating a state of learned helplessness, psychological regression and depersonalisation.

Covert techniques are; gaslighting, blaming and shaming them into feeling guilt, manipulating their emotions to loving and caring, or attention seeking through emotional blackmail, fear induced tactics, aimed to intimidate and terrify. Overt techniques include forced nudity and head shaving, sleep deprivation and other forms of sensory or emotional deprivation.

In The battle of the sexes! Projective identification may take place with varying degrees of intensity. For the victim subjected to projective identification there are three options;
In narcissism, extremely powerful projections may take place and obliterate the distinction between self and other. (Stockholm syndrome)

In less disturbed personalities, projective identification is not only a way of getting rid of feelings but also of getting help with them. (Getting emotional needs met through professional services,) exaggerating or elaborating health complaints for attention from peers, colleagues and health professionals.

In an emotionally balanced person, projective identification may act as a bridge to empathy and intuitive understanding. (Healthy relationship communication)

Relationship problems have been linked to the way there can be a division of emotional labour in a couple, by way of projective identification, with one partner carrying projected aspects of the other for them. Thus, one partner may carry all the aggression or all the competence in the relationship, the other all the vulnerability. This is the basis for opposites attract, we each seek that of the other, paradoxally, like attracts like. The message here is both people have emotional wounds, how each responds, is what gels their relationship.

Jung psychologists describe the resultant dynamics as characterising a so-called “wounded couple” – projective identification ensuring that each carries the most ideal or the most primitive parts of their counterpart. The two partners may initially have been singled out for that very readiness to carry parts of each other’s self; but the projected inner conflicts/division then come to be replicated in the partnership itself.

Conscious resistance to projective identification may produce on the one side guilt for refusing to enact the projection, on the other side, bitter rage at the thwarting of the projection. This is where the relationship is at danger point if the boundaries of the other has been crossed.... The dysfunctional couple are bonded through mutual, unconscious wounds!

Psychological projection is a theory in psychology in which humans defend themselves against their own unconscious impulses or qualities (both positive and negative) by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others. For example, a person who is habitually rude may constantly accuse other people of being rude. It incorporates blame shifting, projecting their own shadow onto an innocent and rejecting this part of them-self. Unconsciously, the rejection acts as a protective layer to the fragile psyche. Hiding in the shadow, it breathes life, intact, in the shadow, the projection can be observed in the persons social behaviours.

Mind games are used to define three forms of competitive human behaviours

1: A largely conscious struggle for psychological one-upmanship, often employing passive-aggressive behaviour to specifically demoralize or empower the thinking subject, making the aggressor look superior; also referred to as “power games”. Commonly used in relationship interactions between two people vying for top position. Alternatively, it is seen in the corporate world.
2: The unconscious games played by people engaged in ulterior transactions of which they are not fully aware, and which considers to form a central element of social life all over the world. – Psychological manipulations of deception are highlighted or exposed! This is gas lighting effect!
3: Mental exercises designed to improve the functioning of the mind and/or personality, such as brain teasers or puzzles for mental stimulation. Brain training, or cognitive exercises. Stimulating optimal mental and cognitive health.

A psychological mind game
Mind games that are underhand and unconsciously driven take form in the collective unconscious, take for example the popular novel 50 shades of grey. A typical stereotype of a bad boy, growing up in care (orphan archetype) and make him rich. (Adoption equals money) Immediately, the reader takes pity on him, and discovers that he was groomed through sexualised abuse from an older woman, he essentially is a VICTIM. This aspect of the story demonstrates the trauma bonding that has been institutionalised, into him, from childhood! It also opens up a women’s empathy towards the lead character. The story offers the psyche to empathise and feel pity for the lead, the story then blindsides the reader with money, riches and sexualised behaviour. On one side of the coin, the popularity of the story highlights how repressed the female sexual energy actually is, it opens the psyche to accepting abuse through sexualised activity and behaviours. On the other side of the coin, it drives popular culture and demonstrates that women will do anything for money! Even degrade and defile themselves! Which further demonstrates the oppression of female sexuality! The story holds fast because it highlights two very important facts that runs in the undercurrent of collective consciousness.

Two things that dependent women want, money and passion. (Caught in a double bind) Immediately, women are flocking to read the story and watch the film, not because the story line is a literature classic, but because it offers them the phantasy of a man, who can abuse through sexual dominance, as long as he’s RICH! In reality, this dominance is transferred to the conscious collective. Men want control and for women to be submissive, women want men to be assertive and provide for them. Paradox!

The psychological construct is deeply embedded and runs in the undercurrent of the collective consciousness, reinforcing the belief through sales, popular culture and consumer demand.

3 thoughts on “Gaslighting – In Narcissism

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